Why are men so obsessed with 24-year-old women?

Studies have shown that a straight man will always find women in their mid-20s sexually attractive, whatever his age. Gareth May explores the reasons why

Hugh Hefner with bunnies Holly Madison, left, and Bridget Marquardt

Have you ever caught yourself checking out a woman only to realise that she’s much younger than you? Well, don’t beat yourself up too much. Blame science.

Last month, a study published in the Evolution and Human Behaviour Journal revealed that men have a tendency to be sexually attracted to women in their mid-twenties. The study of 12,656 Finns also affirmed that both younger and older men veered towards women of this age. Which begs the question: why are men so obsessed with twentysomething women?

David M. Buss is an Evolutionary Psychologist and author of The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating. He told me in an email that the findings of the study were “roughly” correct and that men are attracted to women who show cues of peak fertility (youth, beauty, symmetry), typically in the early to mid-twenties and usually centring on the age of 24.

“The evolutionary logic is sound,” Buss says. “Men in our evolutionary past who were attracted to infertile women are not our ancestors; they bit the evolutionary dust. So all men alive today are descendants of a long and unbroken line of ancestral men who succeeded in mating with fertile women.”

Is it really just a caveman thing? Do we simply go for the young twentysomething because she can give us children? Or is there more to it than that? Buss says some have argued that men are attracted to young women because they are easier to control. However, the fact that younger men, including teenagers, are also attracted to women in their mid-twenties debunks such a theory, as the attraction is rarely reciprocated, which makes the women and their sexual preferences fundamentally uncontrollable.

Another explanation of desire has it that we’ve evolved to be attracted to those who react to our attraction with rewarding stimuli, such as a compliment. But, according to Buss, since younger men, and men who are more than 10 years older than a 24-year-old, are not ‘reinforced’ by these women, that theory also goes out the window.

Which brings us back round to the caveman hypothesis. If men are always programmed to find women in their mid-twenties attractive – if only to pass on their genes – doesn’t this deal a blow to the idea of monogamy? “The key thing is that one has to separate sexual attraction for short-term mating and long term desires in a mate for a committed relationship,” Buss says. It’s a notion backed up by Buss’ study of 37 different cultures around the world, which revealed kindness and intelligence as two traits that beat out ‘physical attractiveness’ in desires for a long term mate (alongside compatibility such as similarity of political orientations and religious views).

“Just as with food, we can choose to act on our desire or not to act on our desires. If we want to lose weight, we might forgo that dish of ice cream, even though we desire it,” Buss says. “Similarly, men who experience sexual desires for younger women when they are already married may choose to act or not to act on their desires. Older women too find younger guys sexually attractive. So a 40-year-old woman might want to have sex with the pool boy, but she certainly would not want to marry him.”

It seems there’s a Hugh Hefner inside us all. And straight men everywhere are destined to run on the treadmill of unending attraction to mid-twenties women well into our octogenarian years, regardless of whether or not we actually act on it. As Buss admits, in the modern environment, “these preferences may indeed lead to problems.”

Independent Psychologist Dr George Fieldman agrees: “As long as the most fecund women of the population are in their mid twenties we will always see this sexual attraction,” Fieldman warns. ‘[However] the sex drive evolved in a contraception free environment. As we’ve learned more about ourselves, and more about how reproduction works, we’ve said ‘Hang on, we can cleave the usual linkage between sexual activity and having babies. If we use our technology to separate that natural process, we can have lots of fun and sex without having the baby’.’

In other words, there’s a glitch in the system. Men are still programmed to sexually desire young women, but that desire isn’t bearing fruit due to contraception. As a result, according to Fieldman, “it’s very possible that a new selective process will be take place”, albeit one which may take hundreds if not thousands of years. In fact, Fieldman suggests that one day men may find women who have already had children hugely attractive because they show actual fertility – the ability to reproduce – rather than the potential fertility of the fecund twentysomething.

An evolutionary shift which will lead to another problem: a population explosion and the need for a new planet. But we’ll let the descendants worry about that.

Know more: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/relationships/11143773/Why-are-men-so-obsessed-with-24-year-old-women.html

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6 reasons why older men make better boyfriends

George Clooney, the original silver fox marriesWhen it comes to dating, mixed-age relationships often get a bad press.

Personally, I’d choose a silver fox over a young pup any day.

However, some seem convinced that once the novelty of an older, wiser arm around your shoulder has worn off, all that is left are hip replacements and Antiques Roadshow repeats.

I disagree.

  • An older man knows who he is

And being a man of maturity, is more likely to have more stability both personally and professionally than your average 20-year-old.

The drudgery of ‘finding his direction’ – also know as lying in bed until midday – is behind him and he is will be at a point in his life where fun and companionship (read surprise weekends away in Paris) are his top priorities.

  • An older man won’t queue for an iPhone6 at 3am

Over his dead bodyOr spend his life on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.

But will do crazy, old-fashioned things like pick up the phone and talk to you or, steady yourselves, take you out and have a conversation with you face to face.

The consequence of this is that one tends to not only develop a ‘real’ relationship more quickly but, because his Facebook page hasn’t been updated since 2001, you won’t spend your evenings sitting at a computer screen stalking every individual he has ever had sex with before meeting you.

Or maybe that’s just me.

  • He has no idea what spinning is

When a man hits middle age he tends to care less about maintaining a six pack and more about where the next good bottle of Sancerre is coming from.

Not only will you not have to argue with your boyfriend about who has better abs but you can enjoy a relationship where le belle vie takes priority over protein shakes and being ‘ripped’.

  • He knows where your clitoris is

Yes, yes, yes! … eight whole hours’ sleep

There is no guarantee that any man will be a spectacular lover, regardless of their age.

However, the likelihood is that with age, comes experience.

An older man won’t start fingering your kneecap in the hope that your G-spot is somewhere in that region or spend two and a half hours humping away like a feral animal on top of you, in the misguided belief this constitutes good sex.

Think quality not quantity. Or to put another way, an orgasm and plenty of sleep before work the next day.

  • He won’t call you Mummy

Or expect you to look after him.

He will however, treat you like a woman – a sexy woman – who has nothing to do with his mother – or his sub-conscious desire to be breastfeed.

  • He will become bed-bound/die 20 years before you do

And then the fun really begins.

I jest… of course.

Know more: http://metro.co.uk/2014/10/23/6-reasons-why-older-men-make-better-boyfriends-4914409/

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A letter from a younger woman about older men

Anonymous: So, I’m in a relationship with a 22 year difference. We both want each other, and have admitting our love towards each other. The thing that’s a big road block is he worried about how society is going to look at him, and inner turmoil. I’m the younger one. I honestly don’t have a problem with it, but I’m having trouble helping him or even seeing what he’s actually feeling. We’ve been together for a while also, so why all of a sudden? I really appreciate you reading& replying. Thanks. :)

worry about age gap

Answer: That’s a shame, I’m sorry to hear that outside pressure is putting a strain on your relationship. To help you understand his perspective, just think about how people often look at age gap relationships and think that the younger person is being taken advantage of. People can look at the two of you and immediately brand him as a predator, a pervert, or a pedophile. My boyfriend is no stranger to these terms, and at first hearing this kind of awful rhetoric was hurtful, but in time he learned to laugh and brush it off for what it is: total ignorance. It could be that these feelings are popping up now rather than earlier in the relationship because he’s noticing more of the negative signs around him. Maybe he’s catching some weird glances, or perhaps someone he knows may have commented to him that they think that what he’s doing is wrong.

It sucks, but society can influence how we see things. He could feel less positive about your relationship now because it’s being beaten into his head that it can never work. It’s your job to assure him otherwise. You should try to empathize with what he’s feeling, while also maybe pointing out some of the stereotypes that the younger partner is labeled with in age gap relationships (being a gold digger, daddy issues, being victimized, etc.) and say that you’ve risen above the judgement of strangers because your love for him is what truly matters in the grand scheme of things. You couldn’t give a damn what the world thinks because you have each other. Because really, in a couple of years, what will be more important? Having a strong and lasting relationship with someone you adore? Or not having to deal with random idiots on the street who turn their noses up at you? It’s a no-brainer!

I’d like to know your thoughts, Thanks.

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Top 2 rules for dating younger women under 25

The two critical rules for older guys dating girls under 25:

dating younger women under 25

  • Rule #1: Don’t be needy

You should never be needy with any woman (exceptions made if she’s an over 30 divorcee with two kids and a Snickers bar figure) but it is especially important to refrain from showing even the slightest displays of neediness with the under 25 girls. A young woman is extra-sensitive to the subtle signals that a man gives off when he is a little too happy to be with her. If the guy she likes is significantly older, like ten years or more, she’ll be that much more on guard for beta bahavior. An older guy who is needy is a bigger loser than a younger guy who is needy, because the younger guy at least has the excuse of inexperience. Plus, the older guy has to learn how to handle the elevated risk of being labeled a “lech” or “pervy”.

Examples:

Texting
29 year old texts you. Wait 5 minutes before replying.
22 year old texts you. Wait 1 hour before replying, unless it’s a weekend night in which case don’t text back until the next day.

Calling
29 year old calls. Pick up on the third ring.
22 year old calls. Let it go to voicemail and return call minimum of 2 hours later.

Going to a bar together
Chat up one other girl in 29 year old’s presence. Any more than that and you will make her too insecure.
Leave 22 year old for 30 minute stretches of time to flirt with girls in different parts of the bar. If she sees three or more girls laughing along with you, bonus points. You are guaranteed sex that night.

Shit testing
If 29 year old tells you some random guy flirted with her today, show a hint of jealousy.
If 22 year old tells you some random guy flirted with her today, say you hoped she number closed him because she needs a shopping boyfriend.

Post-coital challenge
29 year old gazes at you lovingly and says “I think I’m falling for you.” You say “Me too.”
22 year old gazes at you lovingly and says “I think I’m falling for you.” You say “Thanks! Keep it coming. I’m a sucker for flattery.”

Communication breakdown
29 year old mysteriously stops contacting you. Wait four days before sending casual text asking her out on another date.
22 year old mysteriously stops contacting you. Do not attempt to contact her again. In two months you have a 50% chance of getting a text from her wanting to see you.

  • Rule #2: Don’t be insecure

Many older guys who like dating younger girls fall into the trap of fretting about the age difference. He makes the mistake of bringing the issue up before she has, or cracking awkward jokes about her youth. His age insecurity will lead him to lean on his money or job status as attraction ploys because he won’t believe that a cute younger girl could love him for his personality or strength of character.

The truth is that, contrary to the sugar daddy cultural message, money and a high status job are not required to attract younger women. They help, but what helps a lot more is tight game and a dominant, charming personality. If you are unfazed by the age difference, she will be too. Run the same game at 35, 45, and 55 that you would at 25.

Bear in mind that younger women (barring a few notable golddigger exceptions) are not as practical as older women. They are more whimsical, flirty, passionate, and romantic, and this means you will get more mileage having a youthful outlook, being recklessly spontaneous, maintaining a high level of energy, and focusing on the emotional connections, than you would tempting them with the allure of financial stability and security.

If you follow my advice above, you will have no trouble finding a girl much younger than you to fall in love with you.

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Is Dating A Younger Woman Good?

It is an accepted fact that women prefer resource and stability, while men prefer youth and beauty. Most people think that older men date younger women because they are going through a mid-life crisis. But there may be another reason to this mutual attraction. Women mature faster than men, and they find men of their own age immature when compared to the suave, world-weary older man. Men are attracted to younger women because there is less of a power struggle in the relationship. Everybody will know who wears the pants in their relationship and this satisfies his innate macho pride. A younger woman will be more malleable and the relationship will be easygoing. She will not nag him to commit or be responsible, unlike women his age. In return, he pampers and protects her. Of course there are plenty of gold-diggers and cradle-snatchers out there. But if neither of the partners have ulterior motives, this could be a match made in heaven.dating a younger woman good

Let us examine whether dating a younger woman is a good idea.

  • Maturity Level

Women find that older men have a maturity level that is significantly higher than those in her age group. Older men who have a higher level of maturity will also be more willing to make a commitment or settle down than men her age. Older men find the immaturity of younger women refreshing and attractive, when compared to women their age who are tied down with responsibilities and constant worries.

  • Physical Benefits

A younger woman will always be more active than her older counterpart. She may partake in numerous strenuous physical activities. The older man will also take up these sports to keep up with her, and this will lead to numerous health benefits for him. He will be less prone to disease, have a toned body and a healthier heart.

  • Refreshing Perspectives

A younger woman provides a fresh outlook of the world, which will be enchanting and charming. The older man might be cynical and world-weary, and will be attracted to her zest for life. The enthusiasm of a younger woman will be infectious, and the older man will feel young at heart.

  • Less Baggage

A younger woman always has less emotional baggage than a woman his own age. Older women tend to be more wary and distrustful of men in general. Years of dating would have hardened her attitude towards men. But young women will be more open and are less likely to have murky past relationships.

  • Connection

An older man will connect more to a younger woman. They might want the same things in life, like a family, which men her age are not willing to offer her. An older woman will be too tied down with her responsibilities, juggling work and family, to have a proper relationship. A younger woman will be at her sexual prime, which is appealing to the older man. She craves stability and maturity, which he offers her. Thus, the connection between an older man and a younger woman is stronger.

  • Ego Boosts

A younger woman is an affirmation that an older man is still physically and emotionally appealing. The fact that he is desired by a younger woman and seen as a potential partner will act as a huge ego boost to the older man. Young women also tend to be less judgemental and critical of the older man.

Thus, we see that dating a younger woman is good for the older man as it boosts his ego, improves his health and lets him have a deep connection with he.

Read more at: http://www.boldsky.com/relationship/love-and-romance/2013/is-dating-younger-woman-good-033478.html

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Why do young women date older men?

Have you ever wondered why younger women like older men? There are many reasons why these women fall prey to old men, and here we share a few of those reasons with you. young women date older men

Today, old men have become a wise choice to marry, since women feel they are much more safe and secure with them. Now, we are not talking about safety in terms of physical protection, what we mean is security in terms of money.

Apart from this reason, there are a few more reasons why younger women fall for older men. Some of these might surprise you.

Take a look at some of the reasons why women date old men:

  • Boundaries

Old men have a boundary when it comes to dating. They are less likely to cheat on their young lady love which is why young women date old men. Women who have been hurt in the past are generally the ones who fall for the grey-haired gentlemen!

  • Stability

Yes, money matters a great deal and it is more important than love. It is usually the old men who have a massive bank account. Young men tend to squander away their savings. Therefore, this is one of the main reasons why young women date old men.

  • Sex Matters

Young guys are not that well experienced when it comes to the bedroom. It is the older men who can make a woman twist and twirl in bed and young women enjoy this feeling. Therefore, it adds to the reasons why young women date old men!

  • Pampers You

When you are with an older man, he tries everything within and over his limits to make you happy in all ways possible. It is believed that older men do not have the courage to say no to their young partners as most of them are insecure! Therefore, young women take advantage of this and date old men.

After all this, we hope we have answered your question as to why young women date old men. You should know that age is just another number when it comes to love.

Read more at: http://www.boldsky.com/relationship/love-and-romance/2014/why-do-young-women-date-older-men-038115.html

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More Successful in Younger Woman Older Man Dating Community

A lot of older men looking for younger women today though aren’t patient enough to learn what they need. That may be one of the reasons why they are not able to succeed often in their online dating ventures. If you are one of these men that want to find women who are willing to meet older men and date them, here are a few tips that can help you become more successful in your younger woman older man dating communityOnline age gap dating club

Being too cocky about yourself is definitely something that you should avoid if you are one of the many older men looking for younger women online. You need to keep in mind that young women of today’s generation are smarter when it comes to picking dates. Even if you do look really good, they may still ignore you because of other reasons. If you want to be more effective in your younger woman older man dating community, you need to play it smart and avoid being too confident about yourself.

Older men looking for younger women that they can date should also learn to figure out their dates effectively. Unlike traditional dating approaches, you need to really be keen when figuring out your online date. Since you are pretty much going to communicate most of the time through chat or emails, it is vital that you do not misinterpret your date’s messages. If you are not that sure about what your date is trying to say or do, never be afraid to clarify things with her. You need to keep in mind that it is very important that you avoid assuming things with your date. The more you understand her, the better you will be at coming up with strategies that will ultimately land you her heart.

Lastly, older men looking for younger women to date on the internet should do their best to be kind all of the time. Kindness is something that can really melt a woman’s heart and it is definitely a weapon that you can use to your advantage. Younger women in particular, really love a man that can treat them well. It would serve you well to keep that simple tip in mind because it can get you far in the younger woman older man dating community on the internet today.

Success only comes to those people that really want it and strive to achieve it. This is another very important thing that you should learn at heart if you want to be more successful when dating younger women online. Take into consideration the few things that were mentioned here and there is really no reason to doubt your ability to succeed as one of the many older men looking for younger women to date online today.

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